How I Came to This Place
When I was 26 years old, God saved me from a miserable life of self-indulgence and stubborn independence. You can read my testimony here. A few weeks after He saved me, I was lying in bed one night, praying, and like many young Christians, I asked Him, "Lord, what do You want me to do with my life?"
Audibly, I heard Him say, "Write!" Now, this wasn't the thundering voice from on high that Paul heard on the Damascus road. This was the amused, kind voice of a loving Father saying, "I want you to do what you have always wanted to do."
After I got over the wonder and amazement of hearing the voice of God with my very own ears, I thought, "Wow! I can do that! That's what I've wanted to do practically my whole life!" And I rose up the next morning, sat down, and began to write.
No. I didn't.
I had been writing since I was in the fourth grade (thanks, Miss Fentress, for losing my play - I might dedicate my first book to you), and had even won a national writing award in high school. But I was a single mom with a young daughter. I had college to finish, and to find a job to support us. Soon, I was married again and had more children. So there were babies to care for, cooking, cleaning, laundry, jobs, cars, pets, homeschooling, family, friends, school and church activities, holidays, seasons of plenty and seasons of want... In other words, daily life.
I wrote on occasion, sure. I kept my hand in. But in the back of my mind hovered the thought that I was letting God down by being disobedient to what He had told me to do. The years passed, and my life and the lives of those close to me were touched by tragedy. My faith, a fragile thing with gossamer wings and feeble body became strong as I walked with the Lord, learned to know Him, and saw the incredible empowerment of His grace and truth in the lives of His people.
Now I am what is tactfully called "a woman of a certain age." And I have finally realized that was where the amusement in God's voice that night so long ago came from. He wanted me to write, still wants me to write, but He had to prepare my heart and my spirit, and even my character for it. Frankly, I still don't feel prepared, but does anyone ever feel completely prepared for what has been asked of him? However, it is time to start, so I am hopping on the ride.